When sociopaths lie about you

From:  Love Fraud 

by Donna Andersen

It’s bad enough that sociopaths lie to hook you. Anything they tell you about themselves may be false — their age, education, credentials, family details, income, criminal record, job and work history.

And of course, sociopaths typically lie about their relationship history and status. They claim to be single when they are married; they claim to be childless when they have many offspring — even with multiple partners.

Sociopaths lie — it’s the key characteristic of the disorder. When you fall for the lies, you feel like a chump. But what often turns out to be even more devastating is the lies they tell about you.

The smear campaign

Sociopaths typically engage in a “smear campaign” about their targets. These are outright lies that they tell about you to your family, friends, neighbors, co-workers and others in your social circle.

The sociopath’s objective with the smear campaign is to compromise your social support system, and therefore increase his or her control over you. For this reason, the sociopath may start lying about you long before you suspect any problems in your relationship.

For example, a sociopath may have a conversation like the following with your friend, Jane:

Sociopath: “You know, I found out about six months into our relationship that Mary was cheating on me. She was secretly seeing a guy from work.”
Jane: “I never knew about that!”
Sociopath: “Well, I imagine that she didn’t want to tell you, because you might have said something to me. I know I can trust you.”
Jane: “Of course you can!”
Sociopath: “I really love Mary, so I’ve forgiven her.”

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